Happy Mother's Day: A Grieving Mother's Viewpoint
MOTHERS' DAY 2016: A GRIEVING MOTHER'S VIEWPOINT I've been thinking a lot about Mother's Day this past week. Not because I dread it. I don't. There are a lot of posts starting to show up on the internet about it for mom's whose children have died.
I am one of them.
My daughter Katie died on June 5, 2013 at the age of 23 from Heroin. She often made me homemade cards, and not just for mother’s day. I have one of them sitting on my bedroom bookcase. Katie’s last Mother's Day card to me was a colored page from a Hello Kitty coloring book. Katie loved to color even as a young woman. It made her feel calm and centered she said. She sent this homemade Mother's Day card to me from Rehab in Florida. She wrote on it " Happy Mother's Day. I have been blessed to have you as my mom. I LOVE YOU MOM!!! with a smiley face and xoxo and a heart. She died less than a month later at home. I always appreciated these kind of "cards" the most because of the effort and planning and love that went into them.
I love being a Mom. I also have a wonderful son Brian, my first born. When I was pregnant with Katie I secretly wondered and was afraid that I might not be able to love this new baby as much as I loved him. Gratefully that was not true. Both Brian and Katie have been my greatest teachers. I truly cannot imagine the richness of my life without them! I have often said that I could do without a "career" but not without my children. They are both adults now. Yes, both. Brian is 29 and Katie is almost 28 based on human terms although she is living in Spirit. I know she is doing her own work, impacting lives and life itself. Just as important and valuable as what her brother and friends and parents are doing in the physical world. So I think you have got it.
I LOVE MOTHERHOOD. love the two souls that in this lifetime I have been given the privilege of guiding in their journeys through this physical world.
What has led me on this blog, is the WHOLE IDEA OF "MOTHERS' DAY".I think it is wonderful that in 1914 the former president Woodrow Wilson created a day to honor mothers. Seems kind of silly too though. How about honoring our mothers (and fathers) everyday? I feel that I did that as a child and also felt that my children honored me and their father daily, and still do! What bothers me and actually is the REAL POINT here is that this day, the second Sunday in May every year and this year May 10, 2017, is being a source of extra pain and dread and resistance to living by sooo many women whose children have died and people who are grieving the death of their mothers!
My question to all of us is "why are we giving our personal power away?" Why are we allowing this one day, proclaimed to be for mothers, to cause us so much more sadness and angst? Really.
I learned a Universal Principle many years ago and I must say I have never been the same since I heard this: WE (all human beings) GIVE MEANING TO EVERYTHING. Yes, we human beings create the meaning for everything in life! Wow! Now obviously we do not have to take this to heart or believe it... But just consider this: If this is so, We are responsible for the extra sadness, depression, the feelings of being left out, victimized by life, poor me, poor you and so forth.
If Mothers Day helps you to MOURN more effectively and can provide some healing that is great! Otherwise, Why? Why are we allowing this one day disempower us and cause extra pain and sadness. And it happens every year! Personally I will not let this day demean my life, the way I feel or live or be in that day.
I CHOOSE to experience it as the honor that it is meant to be. To be about the relationship I provided, the recognition of my contribution to humanity. I refuse to let a cultural event that is meant for "only good" to become a dreary, avoidance filled day despite the reality that my beautiful daughter has left this physical plane. She is very much alive in Spirit, and her Soul left this planet as was it’s Divine Soul Plan. And so did your’s for that matter.
HOW WILL YOU CHOOSE? It is all perspective, all perception. A miracle has been defined as a "change in perception". What "Miracle" will you allow, create for yourself this Mothers' Day?
Maybe that could be the true gift to yourself as a mother. I am a beacon for healing and realigning women with the truth of their being. Join Me in Permission To Live; a unique, life enhancing mourning and healing group experience for parents who are living with the death of a child and adults who are living with the death of a spouse or parent. You do not have to suffer; and in Truth you were not designed to suffer! A truly blessed, peaceful, miraculously loving Mothers' day to you all.